How to survive the disappointment in a person?
Our whole life is solid meetings and parting. With relatives, relatives, friends, cities and countries, classes and professions. Disappointment in a person we trusted can be a good lesson for us. Or destroy life by inflicting an unhealed wound. Is it possible to simultaneously maintain the immediacy of perception and sincerity and protect yourself from pain? Or should we act on the principle of "do not betray the one who does not trust anyone"?But it's almost impossible to live like this.
Disappointment in a person can be caused even bynot so much his betrayal or a low act. After all, much can be understood and forgiven. We are more concerned about the need to change our perception of it. Disappointment in a person is always associated with emotions and feelings - it is most often due to the fact that we did not know his present that they created a fictional image. The mismatch of this image with our expectations causes so much resentment and bitterness.
Quotes about disappointment in people teach us wiseand a calm attitude towards human weaknesses. For example, one of them says: "Faith helps to live." Disappointment teaches us to think. " But W. Churchill formulated the idea somewhat differently: "If you are still capable of disappointment, then you are still young." Let's think about these words: they are truthful and witty. Skepticism and cynicism, the belief that the whole world is not trustworthy is a kind of old age of the soul.
Disappointment in a person is possible only if,when we believe our neighbors. Can I prepare for it? Put on a protective shell? You can only develop tolerance and the ability to forgive yourself. Disappointment in a loved one is akin to the destruction of an idol, a deity. If we look at someone who is dear to us, not as an embodiment of an ideal, but as a mere mortal with all his virtues and weaknesses, it will be much easier for us to accept his sins.
How do you survive the disappointment in a person? How not to be embittered and not to hate it? Sometimes it seems that this is impossible. Betrayal and meanness are wounded. But it's worth trying to separate the emotions that cause this or that act, your idea of a person, from real needs and situation. Are you angry or suffering because someone close did not do the way you expected? What has he said about you that is bad or meets another / another? Try to analyze the situation from another side. Why, in fact, did this person have to meet your expectations and imagination, and not act in the way that seems right to him? After all to yourself it would be much easier for you to forgive sins and shortcomings. Because you can understand yourself.So try to understand another. What motivated him? What were the goals before him? Surely he did not try to specifically disappoint you or hurt you.
We constantly overestimate the bar, demanding from lifeall at once. In our youth we are full of hopes and dreams. But even ourselves we can not perceive objectively. Mental maturity manifests itself in not living illusions. To accept reality as it is. Between cynicism, total skepticism and iridescent optimism, there is also a truly adult position. Live here and now, with those who surround, accepting the world, themselves and other people.